the criminal admitted the motive

I received contact from the prosecutor, and I went to his office.
Thankfully, the meeting was started from 6 pm after finished my work

He said, the criminal finally admitted that the motive for the attack was for sexual purpose.

That means I don’t need to attend the trial!
I was so relieved.

Because the trial system was Citizen Judge System.
I actually really did not want to talk about in front of many strangers.


The prosecutor said the lawyer pursued the criminal to admit the motive to not to put more burden to the victim.

It was so grateful.


Yes she is my side.
Even though she is a lawyer, she can understand deeply about the victims and can act for them.


Because the criminal admitted the motive, the investigation at the prosecution completed quickly.

What should I do was only wait for the trail.

So I decided to write a letter to the criminal.


I don’t mean to forgive him.
I just wanted to let him know that

What you sow is what you get.
So prepare for the hell.
Face what you did and reform yourself.
If you don’t love yourself, do thing that you will be able to love.
Do not attack people, try to be loved by people.

The contents was like above.


Maybe this is just for self-satisfaction and hypocrisy.
The criminal might not understand anything about what I want to say.


Write or not.
I asked myself again and again.

It’s insane to write a letter to the man who attacked me.
My people might think so.


But I wanted to let him know that “what you sow is what you get”.

You choose to attack woman at midnight.

The victims had the most scary night in their life because of you.

So same amount of hell that you gave to the victims is waiting for you in the future.

I just wanted him to know it.


I finally wrote the letter and gave it to the lawyer.



********************************

検事から連絡があり、面談する事になった

私の仕事に合わせて、夕方からの面談にしてくれた

検事との面談で、犯人がわいせつ目的だった、と動機をようやく認めたと聞いた

これで裁判に出なくてもよくなったという事になる

心が随分と軽くなった

やはり人前で話すのは嫌だった

しかも今回の裁判は裁判員裁判と聞いていたから、なおさらだった

検事いわく、弁護士が被害者にこれ以上負担をかけないためにも動機を認めた方がいい、と犯人を説得してくれたそうだ

ありがたかった

やっぱり同じ女性

弁護士とは言え、被害者の立場に立って行動してくれる素晴らしい弁護士さんなのだ

素直に感謝した

犯人が動機を認めた事で、検察での聴取も無事終わり、

後は裁判の開始を待つのみとなった

裁判に出なくてもよくなった事で少し余裕が出た私は、

犯人に手紙の返事を書くことにした

許す気はない

自分がやった事は必ず自分に返ってくる

だから覚悟してほしい

自分の罪を見つめて更正して欲しい

自分を愛せないなら、愛せる様に努力して欲しい

人を襲うのではなく、愛される様に努力して欲しい

そんな内容だった

これは偽善的な行為なのかもしれない

相手にとっては絵空事なのかもしれない

相手の心には一切届かないかもしれない

書くべきか否か

自問自答を何度もした

犯人に手紙を書くなんて、どうかしてる

人に話したらきっとそう言われるだろうと思った

でも犯人に因果応報を教えたかった

自分がした事は必ず自分に返ってくる

夜中に人を襲う選択をしたお前には

女性に人生で1番怖い思いをさせたお前には

必ずそれ相当の地獄が待っている

そう知って欲しかったのだ

手紙を書き終え、弁護士との面談の日を待った